We broke up because of my “communication problems.” Just in case you didn’t know, your copy of The Stand is coming back to you Saturday afternoon.
We Broke Up Because:
We broke off any real chance to a future. Future is a big word, and I didn’t see you in mine.
We broke up because our romance was lovely onstage, but not in real life. You were not, in fact, that sword fighting hero who always had the right words, and I was not, as it turned out, a clever and sexy maid. I realized this too late, but you never realized it at all, and that is why we broke up.
We finally broke it up when breaking up more than five times became a monthly habit.
We broke up because you said you could buy my family. Clearly this makes you a superior being.
We broke up because we were too young. That’s it really. You loved me enough; I loved you enough. In the end, we still needed time to become the people we are now. Ten years later, aided by all the lessons we taught each other, we have both found a second wind for love- victoriously.
Lured by the legends of old I took a one-way ticket to a Byzantine monastery in Greece.
You had a high girlish giggle. I only had two options, the other option being murder. You are welcome for my self-restraint.
You grew your hair longer, and you didn’t look like Matt Bellamy anymore.
We broke up because when you stayed over, every time you stayed over, you would pour too much milk for your cereal, and you would never finish it. I wanted you to slurp it up, take more cereal, or just not do it again. There’s something very unattractive about a bowl of greying tepid milk.
We broke up because we wanted to buck the trend. We didn’t want to be another rock-solid high school couple that tried long distance only to limp along during freshman year of college and eventually end unceremoniously over thanksgiving break. I still wonder if it was the right call.
We broke up because you are fickle and I thought I could fix you.
a whole fifteen minutes.
you’re kidding me right
We broke up because meeting halfway was just too far for both of us..